The Ninjabot

Zombie Sak: Survial Kit Tomahawk Duffle

Posted on October 13, 2013 at 10:58 am by Jess Hicks

It’s been 3 weeks since the incident happened, since the dead began rising. I always thought the Zombie Apocalypse would have been awesome, killing zombies and no responsibilities. God what I would give to have a student loan payment due or my dishwasher to break again…

Anyway, I should get started…I don’t think I have much time on this generator or with this computer. It never occurred to me that the Zombie Apocalypse would mean real outdoor survival. That sounds stupid but I always assumed there would be an underground military base or a prison to hide in with food and water. Sure, those things exist but I haven’t found one that is habitable yet, they are either overrun with the dead or filled with people who aren’t too welcoming of strangers. Basically I have been staying in a small shack and searching for anything that could help me survive. I really thought I was going to die soon, the air is getting cold which means winter is coming (I miss Game of Thrones so much!) and food is getting scarce.

Yesterday I caught a break though, finally some good news in this hell. While running my daily routes in search of help I decided to take a detour and as I was running through the woods something caught my eye. A red bag laying on the ground covered in some leaves and dirt. I ran over to check it out and to my delight it was a legitimate survival kit! I snatched it up an ran back to my shack and here’s what I found:

Zombie Sak

  • 2 Bags of non perishable food: Whole wheat bread and something called “Bacon in cheddar”…times are tough I’m not complaining.
  • 1 Collapsible water bottle: Ideal for cold liquids which will come in handy during the winter months.
  • 4 Sanitary Towelettes
  • 2 Surgical mouth masks
  • 1 Survival guide
  • 10′ Emergency Cord
  • 1 Map Compass
  • 1 Emergency Whistle
  • 1 Survival Blanket
  • 3 Safety Pins
  • 36” Role of Duct Tape
  • 18” x 12″ Sheet Aluminum Foil
  • 8′ Snare Wire
  • 1 Box Waterproof Matches
  • 4 Fishing Hooks
  • 4 Fishing Sinker Weights
  • 50′ 10lb  Fishing Line
  • 1 Surgical Blade
  • 1 Reusable Zip-Lock Bag
  • 5 Wound Closure Strips

And the best thing of all….a lightweight sturdy Tomahawk. The handle is soft but not slick, it’s easy to handle and light. The swing is fast and the blade is sharp. It has a cover over that can be hooked onto you easily. The cover is kind of hard to put back on in a hurry but it’s better than slicing yourself  wide open.

I haven’t had a chance to use everything yet, I need to use it sparingly, but this is the best thing to happen to me in a weeks. I only wish the bag wasn’t so bright, I have covered it in mud and dirt so I can be easily hidden. Thankfully, the bag itself seems to be waterproof. I dropped it in the lake while fishing.

Thanks to this kit I have been warm and dry for the first time in weeks. I have caught fish with my makeshift fishing poll and cooked it using fire and the aluminum sheet. It won’t last me forever but it has bought me some time and has taught me a bit about outdoor survival. The tomahawk comes in handy while fending off the dead as well, though it does require some up-close combat. The masks stop blood from getting in my mouth and the tomahawk slides right into their rotting flesh.

I should go now, but I wanted to leave this as a message in case anyone out there is still connected to the web. These kits went for $52.99 before the world went to crap. At the time you might have thought that was a bit much but I’m telling you this kit has saved my life on more than one occasion. Thank you to the creators of the Zombie Sak, I hope you are surviving the end of the world as well as I am.

    • Jennifer

      Awesome. I love that this was written post apocalyptic. Genius.

    • Stay safe, Jess. If you can rendezvous with us in California, then maybe we can help each other survive!

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