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Why Do I Hate This Season of Dexter So Much? SPOILERS!

Posted on August 8, 2013 at 6:31 pm by Chris Teregis

I remember watching the first season of Dexter and being completely glued to my seat, staying up until the wee hours of the morning just trying to squeeze in that last episode so that I could at least get two hours of sleep. Each episode was better than the next. I was drawn to the provocative nature of the show. It was so gripping and unpredictable that it felt dangerous to watch. It is sad to say that I am now finishing the last season of Dexter completely glued to my phone, browsing Facebook, and waiting to watch Ray Donovan.

Why am I so completely and hopelessly uninterested with this season? It’s the FINAL season. Everything has been leading up to these final episodes and it is just, for lack of a better phrase, “Totes shitty.” Was it an illusion? Was the show always bad? Did I outgrow the show…or was it something else?

Oh wait.

Nevermind, I got it. I know why I hate the show now. It’s because it is actually bad. The character arcs make absolutely no sense. Deb has cured her PTSD in what, a week? SHE’S FINE NOW? And this Vogel character? She’s the mastermind behind “The Code”? Are you telling me that Dexter is RoboCop? Because it sounds like your telling me that Dexter is RoboCop and Vogel is this guy.

Miguel Ferrer as Bob Morton

Miguel Ferrer as Bob Morton

The writers just forced Quinn (Miami Metro’s Most Likely to Have an STD) into a relationship with Jaime Batista so he can get close to Dexter, and who cares about that, because obviously Quinn is going to find out that Dexter is a murderer and it’s going to put Debra in the exact same position she was in when she killed LaGuerta.

Speaking of LaGuerta, did they ever explain what happened in the investigation of her death? No! They didn’t! Quinn literally says the line “Dex walked us through it.” That’s it. That’s the justification they give for the most major turning point any character has had since Dexter met the Trinity Killer. There’s no further information, just slack-jawed Quinn staring into Debra Morgan’s weird, half squinted face, saying one line.

Sometimes, it looks like you did.

Sometimes, it looks like you did.

The Creativity Clusterfuck

In my honest opinion, this is what happens when too many hands get in the cookie jar. The actors (now producers) want to do certain things. The studio wants to do their thing. The team of twenty writers want to do their things, and the creator (now counting piles of money) is packing his/her bags and leaving town. So the way they all get along here, is through a series of creative compromises that make no sense whatsoever and it all culminates in an unbelievable mess that leaves the fans disappointed…Just like Spiderman 3.

Never forget.

Never forget.

Or at least that’s what I have to believe happens. It’s the only thing that I can think of, that gives justification to the reason the finale of Dexter is going over like a fart in church. Here’s to hoping it gets better.

You can follow Chris Teregis’s brain drizzlings on twitter @Christeregis

    • You sir, are on the crack.

    • Randy

      Bravo. The RoboCop reference made my day.

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