The Ninjabot

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Go After the “Girl in the Flower Dress”

Posted on October 22, 2013 at 9:25 pm by Amanda Andonian

marvels-agents-of-shield-girl-in-the-flower-dress

Well, the promise of last week is gone. Tonight’s episode of Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. “Girl in the Flower Dress” was as lame as lame can be. Setting aside the terrible hacking jokes and even worse caricatures that were every single Chinese character in the episode, this was still a truly bad hour of television.

First off, the story. Chan Ho Yin is some kind of pyromaniac who can conjure fire at will, but S.H.I.E.L.D. is keeping tabs on him to make sure he doesn’t spontaneously combust and cause a whole heap of trouble. That is until Project Centipede gets ahold of him, wanting to harvest Chan’s platelets, which are conveniently fire retardant. You know, because otherwise he’d burn to a crisp every time he tries to create more fire.

Of course, that’s exactly what happens once they “drain” him of all his platelets. Chan can’t make fire without burning his skin off, which supposedly turns him into a “homicidal maniac” as Agent May so charmingly put it. Oh, and along the way we meet some hacker friend of Skye’s who she’s been in contact with since the beginning, and who tipped off Project Centipede about Chan’s presence in Hong Kong. Remember that text message she sent in episode one? Yep, it was to this dumbass.

And what a dumbass he is! For the most famous hacker guy in the world, Miles is kind of an idiot. Who sees a company called “Project Centipede” and actually thinks that it’s about studying centipedes? Also, Skye does not have any chemistry with anyone on this show. Not Ward, not Coulson, and certainly not Miles. Her relationship with Miles wasn’t in the least bit convincing, and their opening argument with each other (and subsequent “love making”) was lackluster and bland. Definitely one of the most forced and awkward encounters we’ve seen on this show, and that’s saying something.

For a supposedly ensemble cast, far too much time is spent on Skye and her “mysterious” motives. My argument from last week that Fitz and Simmons are kind of useless was only reinforced this week. The two of them were given virtually nothing to do except make self-conscious jokes and needless exposition. Ward was just Ward, and May’s flirtation with Coulson was a teeny bit creepy. The writers really need to spend more time on everyone else in the team, and less time on Skye.

Finally, Skye’s little revelation at the end that she’s just trying to find her parents. Somehow, her whole “freeing information” schtick was a little more convincing when she was just an annoying hacker who wouldn’t leave S.H.I.E.L.D. alone because she thought it was fun. For whatever reason, actual emotion out of her feels even less genuine. Whether it’s a fault of Skye’s character development or the skills of the actress playing her, the last thing that Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. needs is to become The Skye Show.

Actually, the whole “giving him a name” joke was kind of amusing, as if giving a superhero name to a person with abilities somehow makes them crazier. Pretty much the only clever thing to come out of this episode.

Girl in the Flower Dress: C-

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., Season 1 Episode 5, “Girl in the Flower Dress,” aired on ABC October 22nd, 2013 at 8/9c.

You can follow Amanda on Twitter at @reiko516.

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